Reminiscent of third year high.......

I was ummm sorting through some of my stuff last night and I came across an old notebook of mine. It was a green filler with so much grafiti inside. There were no notes, no equations, just a bunch of signs and symbols...... until the last few pages where I found a few entries..... here's one of them......

"Once I fell in love with a girl and she fell in love with me. Months passed and time went by and I just wished that every moment would last an eternity. But fate would not have it. Weeks passed and I still loved her but something changed, I no longer knew if she still felt the same way about me. Everything was different again. I felt empty and the void inside me had come back, only this time it was twice as large. She had taken with her a huge part of me and I could never take that back. That's when i realized, I truly loved her but such things are meant to last. Happiness is superficial and like any other thing it fades away leaving but painful memories..."

Can you imagine how I felt back then? Sure it may sound emo but back then was there even such a thing? Can you imagine how it feels to love and not be loved back, to lose something you held so dearly because you were left with no choice. I became bitter after that.... Always writing so sad, keeping everything to myself. I fell in love once or twice more but it wasn't really love. I tended to them and cared for them only so that they could find what they were really looking for. Up till a few months ago that was how I live and up till weeks ago I didn't want to admit I was falling in love again..... But it doesn't matter now because I already am. And it may sound cliche to say but it doesn't matter how things end. What matters is now the memories that will be, I'd give everything for these moments to last forever and if they don't then I'd be glad they hapened anyway.... Life is too short to be regretting....

Hahahahaha so emo..... thought lang sumaksak sa utak ko yan kahapon. Ba't naman kasi kailangan makita ko pa ang notebook na yun. Hahaha! (hmmmm kung nababasa mo to seryoso talaga ako sa sinabi ko) :) Ciao!